Saturday, October 18, 2008

I know I know...

It has been a say I have been in a funk is an understatement. So much so that I boycotted 2 months of blogging. Ok, that is not true...but it is interesting how people deal with adversity.

Some people just get busier and stay distracted by the 'stuff' of their lives. Workaholics and the like...

Well, that is not me. I am a pouter, and so is Cessie, so we just "take our toys and go home," suck our thumbs and sit in the corner. It is weird because I would have argued with anyone that my spiritual gifting was FAITH. But in the last year or so it has not been.

I don't like a pity party and I hate making excuses...they are so cliche'. So I just stay quiet and withdraw. I can fake it pretty good on the surface and I am talented enough in church life to still be effective, but I am not happy or fulfilled in where we are or see a lot of hope in the near future. Though it is hopeful, it take lots of energy to live in that hope at this point.

Forgive my ranting but this is kind of therapeutic. I am fine and God is still in control. I know all the promises God has for me and He still speaks. It's one of those seasons where things don't "feel" right. Relationships are strained, finances are limited, and the Ministry is just there. No movement on any front and sometimes it just all hits you at once. Ya know what I mean?

Keep praying for us, and don't take this post for more than it is. Just 'words for the wind" (the book of Job).